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Joke of the Day

"Joke How do you fit an elephant into a Safeway bag? Answer: you take the S out of Safe and the F out of way."

"Q: How is Saddam like Fred Flintstone ? A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble."

"Women: When it comes to doggie style...men are behind you 100%"

"I'm 30 years old and I've watched Frozen 18 times this week... For those of you out there thinking about having unprotected sex tonight..."

"What's the best time of day? The Spanish Inquisition. . . . . . Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition."

"What do Little Miss Muffet and ISIS have in common? They both have Kurds in their way."

"Why wasn't the man considered attractive? The laws of gravity didn't apply to him."

"The other day I saw a short man carrying an LED tv and I asked "" hey do you help carrying that tv?"" And he replied all pissed off ""Fuck off dude, this is my tablet"""

"What did the surgeon say to his constipated patient? Cut that shit out!"

"Did you hear about the feminist picnic? Yeah, apparently it got cancelled, no one wanted to make the sandwiches."