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Joke of the Day

"I have a rare muscle disease that causes my hands to write racist things that I don't remember later. The Doctor is calling it Ron Palsy"

"As if being a surgeon wasn't enough you're a general too?"

"69 is the kamikaze of oral sex .. If I'm going down you're coming with me."

"Two wrongs don't make a right. And two half-wits don't make a wit."

"Zombies are categorically asexual as they are more interested in taking head than giving head."

"What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light-bulb? You can un-screw the light-bulb"

"Priest and a Rabbi are walking down the street. They pass a playground where a little boys playing. The Priest says to the Rabbi, ""Hey you want to screw that kid?"" The Rabbi replies, ""Out of what?"""

"Sometimes I use big words I don't understand to make myself look more photosynthesis"

"What is Donald Trump's favourite nation? Discrimination."

"My wife and I are walking through Central Park and pointing out all of the places that we remember seeing dead bodies on Law & Order."