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Joke of the Day

"Don't take a leaf out of my book I use leaves as bookmarks."

"A local grocery bagger has been bagging cola on top of bread. Many were concerned that their bread would be flattened. His response to their concerns was ""It's fine. They're soft drinks"""

"What's the difference between a bad mechanic and a politician? With the mechanic, there's a shot something might get fixed..."

"Where do ISIS fighters go to purchase soda and candy? Allahu snackbar!"

"Mummies are basically just zombie burritos."

"How do you know your sister is having her period? (Sick danish humor) NSFW When your fathers dick taste like blood."

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None! ... They just beat the room for being black."

"On a scale of 0-1... How much do you love binary?"

"Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? Because everybody who can run, jump and swim are already in the U.S."

"What dance did the Pilgrims do? The Plymouth Rock."