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Joke of the Day

"#ReplaceACelebWithAHouseHoldItem Nail Patrick Harris"

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"Feminists hate words with masculine-sounding roots... ...maybe that's why none of them have any manners."
"Ever meet one of these people that makes everything a competition? I've met more."
"What position would Obama be if he played football? The half-black"
"I ask Google the questions I'm too scared to ask other people."
"What kind of car does a Japanese chef drive? Rolls Rice"
"I asked a frenchman what his favorite game console was I don't think he understood me though, he just replied ""oui""."
"A friend of mine just got fired from his job as a butcher. Apparently he was offal."
"if the plan is ""eat pancakes now figure out life later"" then yes everything is going according to plan"
"After a tornado tore through town, thankfully no one was hurt. The trees were stripped bare, though. God breathed a sigh of releaf."