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Joke of the Day

"Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans."

"I think we all know who the big fat loser was tonight... Rosie O'Donnell"

"What's the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball."

"Some days you're the Titanic, some days you're the iceberg and some days you're that guy who hit the propeller on the way down."

"Of course there's a financial crisis in Greece. How much yogurt could they possibly sell."

"I just rewrote history!!!! ~~History~~ **History** im so lame omg..."

"Hit a cop car last night. The driver let me off with a warning..... ""Anything you say can and will be used against you."""

"Only in America: We have a holiday devoted to gratitude & then less than 12 hrs later beat the shit out of each other for a $10 crockpot."

"Person asked me If I wanted to have a threesome I said no thanks if I wanted to disappoint two people at once I'd go out to dinner with my parents."

"It's actually a good thing money doesn't grow on trees because I've killed every plant I've ever owned."