96972

Joke of the Day

"Nothing is quite as scary as hearing your doorbell ring on the same night you made a blood sacrifice to the dark lord."

"its 2013 fellas, if youre saying anything other than ""punch out a grumpy"" to describe taking a crap youre a dinosaur"

"What did King Midas say to get peoples attention? Eh you!!"

"Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out."

"When a bird poops on you, it's also peeing on you, because they do both at the same time. So remember: you're a TOTAL bird toilet."

"him: what do u wanna be? me: I wanna be a cat that transforms into a misty fog when people try to pet me him: wtf, I meant for Halloween?"

"59 thousand years ago, six sapiens were bathing and rubbing each other No homo tho"

"Q. Why does Rilla get mad when he's in a race? A. Because all his friends shout ""GO-RILLA!"""

"Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East? Iran so far away"

"Fidel Castro survived 638 assassination attempts But even he could not survive 2016"