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Joke of the Day

"So I was outside on the farm yesterday when this cow comes charging at me and attempts to jump over the barbed wire fence... It was an udder disaster."

"Q: Why did Bobby Fischer marry a woman from Prague? A: He was looking for a Czech mate."

"Why is there the occasional black Jew? Because Hilter kept them in the oven for too long."

"The worst part of quitting drinking is how few excuses you have for your behaviour"

"if you fap on a plane is it hijacking?"

"""What's your name?"" ""Dave Fucking Smith"" ""Do you have Tourette's, Dave?"" ""No, but the vicar at my christening did."""

"What does earth say to the other planets? You have no life"

"I taught my 1yo how to turn on my mother-in-law's dishwasher since she only uses it for storage."

"Most people don't realize the Hunchback of Notre Dame's back problems were a result of his grueling database entry job."

"What is the difference between me and being artistic? The second letter."