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Joke of the Day

"[presentation] GUY WITH A COMBOVER NAMED IAN: So that's our plan for the next year. Any questions? ME: Why did you call your combover Ian?"

"Did you hear Jurassic World got shut down? Apparently they found a crisp rat in the kitchen!"

"Do you know the difference between people in Dubai and people in Abu Dhabi? Well, the people in Dubai don't like the Flinstones, but the people in Abu-Dhabi-Do."

"Drugs don't ruin your career. Drug tests do."

"What's the difference between a BJ and reddit gold? Your mom never gave me reddit gold."

"I don't like telling people I used to be a stalker. It sounds better saying ""I spent a lot of time studying a broad."""

"How much cash can you make robbing an Indian restaurant? As much as you can curry."

"GOOD COP: He won't talk except in sign language BAD COP: I just cut off his left hand BAD PUN COP: He still has the right to remain silent"

"My doctor told me I need to stop masturbating. I guess it was kinda getting in the way of the physical."

"Why is there such a big contrast between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt? Because they're different cultures."