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Joke of the Day

"""Doctor, how's the patient?"" Doctor: He's critical. Patient: Dear prospective viewers, remaking 'Point Break' was a bad mistake. Utterly pointless."

"You haven't seen a woman overreact until you tell her she is overreacting."

"I respect the Secret Service They are the only law enforcement agency in the country that gets in trouble if a black man gets shot."

"Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken."

"I'm afraid my pet's going to die soon - he's already 14,000,000 in rock-years"

"I got a puppy for my daughter... Good swap if you ask me."

"A child asked me where babies come from. I said,""Like every other man, in Vegas after a night of drinking and clubbing."""

"After everything I put, say to yourself 'So did Michael Jackson' I went to the beach on a sunny day. I saw an ice cream stall. I bought an ice cream. It melted."

"Today I saw two dogs make hot streamy love on the roadside. It's really hurtful to see your ex moving on so quickly."

"A Korean walks into a bar and orders a drink The bartender looks him over and says, ""Aren't you a Lee Ul-Yung to be drinking?"""