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Joke of the Day
"I know a great knock knock joke. You start."
Next Joke
"What's the difference between getting the girlfriend pregnant and locking your keys in the car? How pissed your wife gets when you explain the coat hanger."
"How do you make a dog meow? Put him in a wood chipper and listen to him go ""meeeooowwww"""
"Don't get cute with the live version of your song. We like the one on the album."
"I've been thinking about manufacturing and selling landmines disguised as prayer mats... ...prophets would go through the roof!"
"What is yellow and lives off dead Beatles? Yoko Ono"
"The fancier the design on the back pocket of the jeans, the less fancy the person."
"Yoda: Clouded, your future is. Anakin: Are you smoking pot again? Yoda: Six cheeseburgers, I want."
"When you are getting Old.... You know you're getting old when you stop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there."
"An atheist, a crossfitter, and a vegan are all sitting at a bar... and I only know this because its been reposted over a dozen times."