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Joke of the Day

"I say ""what"" a lot, not because I'm hard of hearing, but because I can't believe how stupid some people are"

"TIL Pat Mccrory doesn't have a gender specified on his birth certificate It's Pat! edit: changed joke entirely"

"What is the first thing a fat person does on a website Accept cookies"

"Why did the two chicken crossed the road? Because The Hound wanted to eat both of them."

"Did ye hear about the movie that the pirate went to see? 'Twas rated Argggghhhhh!!!!"

"My daughter asked me what ""fap fap fap"" means... I think I should stop commenting on her Facebook pictures."

"Hey guy's I'm the titanic I would like to nominate all of my passengers and crew to do the ALS ice bucket challenge, you have 24 hours!"

"What's the difference between a waterproofer and a porn star? Eventually, a waterproofer stops coming home with cock all over them. Forgive my accent, I meant caulk. (My first waterproofing joke)"

"How do you find Will Smith in a snow storm? Easy, just look for the fresh prints!"

"Q: Can gorillas swim? A: No."