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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Mexican child molester? A Pedrophile."

"wife: Why didn't you talk to me about renting a bouncy house?! me [stops jumping]: You would have said no"

"Most computer problems stem from the lack of a fatherboard. No? Ok, I'll show myself out."

"""Holy shit. That butterfly's gonna be HUGE."" -- First person to find a mummy"

"Here is a complete list on how to build a single stair. Step 1"

"My niece was born with no eyelids, bless her heart, but the doctors were able to replace them with surgically removed foreskin... Only side effect is she's a little cock-eyed now."

"I feel bad for spiders. I tripon my two feet all the time. Can only imagine the hell a clumsy spider goes through."

"How high is a stoner sailor? Sea Level."

"Did you hear about the chameleon that couldn't change colors? He had a reptile-dysfunction."

"What Do you Call a Bowler that drops his ball a lot? Gutterfingers!"