81328

Joke of the Day

"*places empty liquor bottle on shelf for display* I'm An Animal Now Everyone. I Decorate With Trash. Literally An Animal"

"A priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar He buys a beer."

"Pete and Marco Rubio are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who is left? Marco Rubio"

"What do you get when you cross Miley Cyrus with an alligator? A caiman like a wrecking ball."

"What are cats favorite Internet Service provider? Comcat."

"I like to steal pictures of people's breakfast and post them again I guess you could say I'm a cereal reposter"

"Why can't Jesus eat pizza? Because he doesn't exist."

"Son: Daddy, what's it like to have the most awesome son in the world ? Father: I don't know, ask your grandfather."

"What did the horse say to the other horse? Hay,I thought you knew horses couldn't speak!"

"Capital letters... ...the difference between using chemicals to remove polish, and using chemicals to remove Polish."