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Joke of the Day

"What were the infinite number of Indian Mathematicians complaining about? That the Hilbert Hotel didn't book Uncountables."

"A man walks into a bar... ...and loses the international limbo championship. (I feel like this is probably really old, but I hadn't heard it before.)"

"Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrh."

"Everyone always pets my pregnant wife's stomach and says 'congratulations' but no one ever rubs my balls and says 'good job'."

"""A weekend wasted isn't a wasted weekend."""

"Why aren't there many black baseball players Because they steal to many bases (I'm not racist it's just a joke don't be butthurt)"

"Please don't feed the Kardashians."

"I think my girlfriend is cheating on me. She keeps screaming some other guy's name when we have sex. Let's just hope I never come across this guy ""rape"" in a dark alley."

"I had a Viagra addiction... and it was the hardest time of my life."

"Him: Are you mad? Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: typing Her: No, I'm fine, why?"