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Joke of the Day

"My new bowflex comes tomorrow...so if anyone wants to buy a slightly used bowflex in a couple months let me know."

"What's Nigel Thornberry's favorite band? The Smashing Pumpkins."

"Why people don't offer chair to Sean Connery when he comes? Because he shits on it."

"Best African soccer team EVER! the French National team..."

"Q: What's the best way to accelerate a Mac? A: 9.81 m/s2"

"A dyslexic person walks into a bar I on the other hand am not dyslexic and am not one to frequent drinking holes. Also I suck at jokes."

"Not all Muslims are terrorists It's just the ones with short fuses"

"Whats a Floridian hookers favorite drink? Sunny-D"

"MAJOR TOM: Tell my wife I love her very much... GROUND CONTROL: She knows. MAJOR TOM: Wait... Is she with you now? GROUND CONTROL: Bye, Tom."

"Now that I think about it, I probably didn't need glasses for my butt. I guess hindsight is 20/20"