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Joke of the Day

"Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there are too many cheetahs."

"Those ""Run Hillary, Run!"" bumper stickers are selling incredibly well Democrats put them on the back of their cars, Republicans put them on the front!"

"Obama is a lot like college Everyone wants four more years, but nobody wants to pay for it."

"Rose petals? Next time scatter something I can eat."

"Need to save money on car insurance? Flee the scene."

"Babe, can u vacuum a Chess board into the carpet again? the guys r here for a lifesize game *guys standing around in armor & kings outfits*"

"Can you people please stop being so condescending and passive-aggressive? Thanks!"

"How did the prof get the latin college girl pregnant? He asked her to do an essay. [Also, I'm latin]"

"Turns out yelling ""I can see your package through those tights!"" gets you kicked out of a ballet."

"A joke the owner of the pizzeria I work at told me while listening to Beethoven. Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? Because it wouldn't stop saying ""Bach, Bach, Bach."""