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Joke of the Day

"A joke the owner of the pizzeria I work at told me while listening to Beethoven. Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? Because it wouldn't stop saying ""Bach, Bach, Bach."""

"What did the doctor tell a welder when the welder asked if his girlfriend(a pilot) using alternative lube was giving him erectile dysfunction? Jet fuel can't melt steel beams"

"Treating testicular cancer.. takes balls."

"Yo mama so stupid she went to the orthodontist to get a blue tooth"

"All I do all day is roll massive joints and deal with huge quantities of dope. Being a pipe inspector sucks."

"What's the hard part about breaking up with a Japanese person? You have to drop the bomb twice so they get the message"

"I like to drink and run. I call it ""Bacardio""."

"How many PMSing women does it take to change a lightbulb? Six. Why? It just does! OKAY!"

"hello 911 yes i touched wet food while doing the dishes i'd like to surgically remove my hand"

"Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it!"