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Joke of the Day
"Why didn't the blind man want a seeing eye dog? He wasnt about to take directions from some bitch"
Next Joke
"Two FBI agents search an office and find a hard drive with ""KGB"" on it... One of the agents asks the other, ""Why didn't they just write '1 TB' instead?"""
"What kind of eye disease do vampires get? Dracular degeneration."
"My dog recently stole my loafers. Now they're his new favorite pair of **chews.**"
"Tie a sweater around your waist so you can pretend a short ghost is hugging you."
"I heard about Buddhist monks who lit themselves on fire to protest prosucution Certainly one way to reach enlightenment"
"I like to make intense direct eye contact with the person in the vehicle next to me at a stop light while I pick my nose."
"Damn boy, are you the black jelly bean? Because I absentmindedly picked you, and now I regret having you in my mouth."
"Ugh, I'm starting to regret getting bangs. ""You don't have bangs."" Wait, what's that thing you get when a bat bites you? ""Rabies?"" That's it"
"Whenever I speak to religious people about my beliefs, I receive a lot of judgement. It seems that Jesus is the only one who truly accepts me for who I am!"