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Joke of the Day

"I found my dad sniffing my sister's underwear. It wouldn't have been that awkward had she not been wearing them at the time."

"Why does Darkwing Duck wear a mask? You are a duck, no one could identify you without describing every other duck on earth."

"What insect would Richard Simmons be? Is he a ladybug or a fruit fly?"

"I hate it when I go to clean my daughters room & I emerge 3 hours later having just finished a delightful tea party with a giraffe & a pony."

"Everyone was dreaming of working for Steve Jobs except his pancreas"

"I bring giant stuffed animals into carnivals so when I walk around people will think that I am good at something."

"""Alright man let's crack open a few cold ones, it's going to be a fun night"" Said one necrophiliac to another as they walked into the morgue"

"Sometimes it just doesn't feel like putting the lotion on its skin."

"24 astronauts were born in Ohio. What is about your state that makes people want to flee the Earth?"

"What did the toaster say to the bread? I want you inside me."