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Joke of the Day

"The IRS is going to start garnishing my wages. I think I'll enjoy getting a sprig of parsley in my paycheck."

"It can get pretty exhausting hating as many people as I do in a day."

"Heard today that most feminists are lesbians that's why they can't think straight."

"Have you ever heard Yoko Ono sing? Lennon really dodged a bullet with that one."

"I rank my kids by how many chores they do and how much they complain. My favorite child is the Roomba."

"The worst number in the world. 6.9 it's 69 interrupted by a period"

"Why did the electron go to jail? He was charged with battery!"

"You know they say 25% of women are medicated for being ""crazy"".. That means the other 75% is running around un-medicated."

"Why did the hipster drown? Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ( )"

"The word on the street is... ...yield. -&y (of course my corny self wrote that.)"