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Joke of the Day

"My friend bought a stone mirror. It reflects poorly on him."

"Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish in highly-contaminated water, feed him for a day."

"Looking at all the post on my news feed, it is very hot today. News Flash people, it is summertime. That is what happens in summer months. Keep me posted in January also when it is cold out. Thanks"

"How many angels can a pinhead dance on? To hold up their pants."

"I bet ""All You Need is Love"" was easier to write on a full stomach."

"What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scotsman? The Rolling Stones sing ""Hey You! Get off of my cloud!"" A Scotsman shouts ""Hey Mcleod!! Get off of my ewe!"""

"What department do you not want to end up at in a corporation run by cannibals? Human Resources."

"I hear it's snowing steadily in Istanbul... In fact, in Istanbul they can't stop the snowplow"

"Did you fall from Haven? Me: ""Girl, did you fall from heaven?"" Her: ""Don't even think about it?"" Me: ""...because Satan did"""

"Who is the best underwater Transformer? Octopus Prime!"