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Joke of the Day

"If your status update contains the words, ""I know 99% of you won't repost this,"" there is a 99% chance you're an idiot."

"If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?"

"I recently traced my family tree... It was easier, I'm rubbish at drawing."

"Only and only when a mosquito lands on your balls do you realize there are some problems that can be solved without violence :)"

"Why did the female asteroid deny her boyfriends marriage proposal? Because she was scared of comet-ment"

"What was Bin Laden's favorite Football team? The New York Jets"

"What's the difference between someone who doesn't use their turn signal and Hitler? You know Hitler will turn Reich."

"An American, a German, an Irishman and an Englishman are on a plane. I forgot to mention an Arab is also onboard... Kaboom."

"What's the only day Asian people can have sex?? Election day"

"""I know,, Let's tape a spider to a lobster and scare the crap out of everyone."" God, when He made scorpions"