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Joke of the Day
"Why couldn't Ray Charles see his friends? Because he was married"
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"What do you call a sweaty British Millionaire? All-quid."
"Putting a bell around a cow's neck to circumvent its stealthiness is just wrong. I say let them hunt."
"Two muffins are baking in the oven One muffin looks at the other and says, ""It's getting pretty hot in here"". The other muffin replies, ""HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN""!"
"The best feeling in the world is realizing that you're perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed."
"What's the difference between a gang of pygmy's and a women's track team? One is a Cunning group of Runts....."
"A man walks up to a girl smoking in a bar. He ask if she knows of sudden infant death syndrome. She replies 'wut'... He says 'cause smoking kills, baby'"
"The most important organ I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, look what's telling me that."
"What does Isaac Asimov take when he has the flu? I, Robotussin."
"Girls : ""Do I look fat?"" A girl asked a high-school boy, ""Do I look fat?"" The boy replied, ""Where?"" [teenage]"