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Joke of the Day

"I've started a glass coffin manufacturing business. My friend asked me if I thought it would be successful. I replied ""remains to be seen""."

"That's a nice ham you got there It'd be a shame if someone put an ""S"" in front and an ""E"" behind it"

"What do you get when you cross an orthodontist and a secret agent? It's confi-dental"

"Planning to edit the three Hobbit movies into one watchable movie. Should I use Instagram or Vine?"

"It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a cockroach move out. ""Good luck,"" he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases."

"The quickest way to avoid a conversation on Facebook is by clicking like."

"I can't sleep in my bed anymore, my mind races thinking of all the stupid stuff I've done in the past. Stupid memory foam..."

"What do you call two black guys walking down the street? Nothing. Are you racist or something?"

"Why can't Donald Trump get elected? Because no Juan will vote for him."

"What's a moo hoo for the sound you hear when a cow spits? A cud thud!"