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Joke of the Day
"I hurt my neck sleeping on a pillow that was too fluffy. My body is not meant for this world."
Next Joke
"So my friend gave me half a pie... So i said, ""No that's one pi"""
"Just ate a Hot Pocket filled with pasta alfredo because my body is a landfill and I don't ever want a husband"
"My friend told me he broke my lamp He said I hope you're not mad. No, im delighted"
"If Justin Beiber and Rebecca Black were drowning and you could only save one, Would you go to lunch or read the paper?"
"What does a vulture bring with him on the airplane? His carrion bag."
"I like my women how I like my coffee... Bought online."
"Ghost of Caesar: and what of my legacy? what now bares my name? Buildings? Mountains? Me:uhh remember how you used to love romaine lettuce?"
"If you're a girl and you get a ticket for going 5-10 over the speed limit, you might want to think about plastic surgery."
"How do you know Santa Claus is married? He only comes once a year."