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Joke of the Day

"real men.. [twitches uncontrollably] don't hi- [""real man"" skin suit falls off revealing fake man who was the one doing bad stuff all along]"

"Just hit a racist with my car. Probably a racist. I feel like he was. Statistically, very likely. Oh so you think there's no racism problem?"

"TIL that I'm dyslexic. Whoops, wrong bus."

"What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock? You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet..."

"A Roman walks into a bar He holds two fingers up to the barman and says ""five beers please"""

"Why do pigs have flat snouts? From running in to trees."

"I take issue with people stealing magazines."

"I don't mean to brag but 14 bots are hitting on me and I've already received 72 viruses. -- Nerds"

"What's the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaaah ? About 3 inches"

"I saw two WNBA tickets nailed to a fence today It's my lucky day! Free nails."