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Joke of the Day

"Some dude was bragging about his brother being a navy seal and it's like...I don't care what colour he is, why is your brother a seal"

"I almost bought a 5 pound bag of mini-eggs at costco. Then I saw the 10 pound bag."

"What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint"

"I didn't realize how cold it was outside today... ... until I saw socialists with their hands in their own pockets"

"Ladies, here's a secret. The moment you are happy and over us, we will send you a text saying that we miss you."

"To the fat people who get offended when someone makes a fat joke, I have two words for you: Lighten up."

"Why are fire trucks always red? You'd turn red if someone pulled on your hose wouldn't you?"

"Why do I watch the Cosby show? I enjoy dark humour. Yes, this was both a rapist and racial joke."

"A man walks into a bar And gets a bloody nose"

"Mew and Mewtwo are both on a slanted roof. Who falls first? Neither. They can both levitate."