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Joke of the Day

"What did the Shit Summoner say at the bar ? Mind if I pull up a stool ?"

"Is it gay if a male doctor feels your balls while looking you deep in your eyes and isn't really a doctor but is just some guy at Target?"

"Should computers be made of glass? No, I don't want anybody to see my browser's history!"

"Why are programmers bad at doing laundry? They throw all their dirty clothes on the heap."

"The Dalai Lama calls and orders a pizza... ...and says ""Make me one with everything."""

"There are now five cup sizes at Starbucks: Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Chuck Norris."

"Criminal Tip: Buy a gun from a guy off the streets. As soon as he sells it to you, point it at him & get your $$ back. Free gun."

"Alcohol is best served."

"I can hear my girlfriend in the other room cleaning up my cat's pee. As soon as I think she's done, I'm going to yell out ""I'll do it babe!"""

"WARDEN: You have been sentenced to the Electric Cher ME: in the what now *a metallic voice sings out: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER LOVE*"