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Joke of the Day

"Musician Joke Q. How many female jazz vocalists does it take to perform ""Summertime""? A. Fucking all of them, apparently . . ."

"How many Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Don't know, the pope hasn't said yet. How many Lutherans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, Lutherans don't change."

"How did the farmer find his daughter? He Tractor."

"GUY: are u doing the mannequin challenge? ME: [standing perfectly still w/ awkward facial expression] no this is just how I am around people"

"One of the toughest parts of adulthood is figuring out how to stay friends with people who post too many selfies"

"It's a far cry for Pokemon Omega Ruby to catch up to Alpha Sapphire in sales https://games.yahoo.com/blogs/plugged-in/xbox-one-surges-to-console-victory-in-november-012230994.html"

"What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her? Her miscarriage"

"I like my jokes like I like my women fucked up"

"How do you find a blind man at a nudist colony? It's not hard"

"I just saw an Asian chick with big boobs and a booty. I took a pic so if any of you have Mythbuster's email hit me up."