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Joke of the Day

"What's the integral of 1/(cabin)? 1 natural log cabin. I'll show myself out."

"How do you process a queue of table delete requests for an asynchronous database? Pop, Lock & Drop It"

"I've always wanted to be a comedian... But I have a tremendous fear of being laughed at."

"Jewish fun fact: If you celebrate Passover on top of an overpass, you go back in time."

"Rodney Dangerfield: ""Y'know, my wife and I, we never have sex... ... we get undressed, we can't stop laughing."""

"Horrible one liner I'm trying to come up with a one liner. Shit."

"I've got 99 problems, which really bothers me since I've also got OCD and I prefer even numbers."

"If I had a nickel for every racist thing I've said... I would be able to buy a Nigger"

"WIFE: you forgot to run the dishwasher again, didn't you? ME: [drinking milk from a flower vase] no, why?"

"Food trucks: Because the problem with most grilled cheese sandwiches is you don't spend 20 minutes breathing exhaust."