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Joke of the Day

"God likes Saturn more than he likes earth Because if he had liked it, he would of put a ring on it."

"Why does everyone make fun of Batmans old suit, the one with the nipples? Bats have nipples. Hell, that's the most sensitive part of a bat."

"You can tune a guitar... but you can't tuna fish!"

"Hello Alcoholics Anonymous? I'd like to anonymously report a bunch of alcoholics getting together in my neighbor's yard. ""Sorry sir, that's not the point of the program"""

"One of My Ex's was absolutely beautiful. But, it didn't workout because all she wanted to do was SWING. I miss third grade."

"Why was the tumblrina mad at the gamer? He was pushing the right trigger."

"If the picture you took of the bad weather while driving isn't followed by a picture of your car crash then it wasn't that bad."

"Hey, hot stuff. Pretty sweet vagina you got there. Maybe later, after I unload the dishwasher, we can-No? That's cool. I have stuff to read."

"Note to self: in future, put stripper in novelty oversized cake AFTER baking."

"Incest! A game for the whole family"