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Joke of the Day

"I'm going to compete in a marathon dressed as Michael Jackson. I'm not sure which race yet."

"Beam me up Scottie! I'm not sure how to work this thing. I have nothing interesting to start with. Maybe a funny joke...Knock Knock!............must have been the wind."

"do you know the difference between a carrot and a fork? If you don't you should be more careful when you eat!"

"Ghost cat: how'd you die? Ghost dog: i bit a guy that ran over my best pal and they put me down GC: i got hit by a car GD: I know GC: ilu"

"Made plans to exercise with a friend and now I have to go get in a car accident."

"The Hispanic fruit cup locks eyes with the beautiful lady across the bar... He makes his move, walks over and says ""why, Jello there"""

"You know what they say about citing a source with more than 2 authors.. It's not hard et al."

"I wonder how many illegitimate socks are out there because of me?"

"Scientists say that girls can get cancer just for being virgins. Luckily theres a vaccine for that."

"Freddie Gray's death was a real Homie-cide"