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Joke of the Day

"The guy I cheat off moved seats before today's spelling test, like he's teaching me some kind of lessen."

"Why doesn't the U.S. government allow students to visit North Korea? They become victims of youth-in-asia!"

"Why did the little Dutch boy have to register as a sex offender? He kept on sticking his finger in a tyke."

"I've lost all the aces from this deck of cards. I just can't deal with this."

"Where does a snowman keep his money? In the snowbank. I'll see myself out.."

"At a restaurant I thought a family was praying at the table but then I realized they were all texting."

"My wife is all, ""we love each other so much we finish each other's sentences,"" until it comes to a prison sentence."

"My girlfriend told me I was a pedophile I told her, ""that's an awfully big word for a six year old""."

"I tried talking to this hot girl and she put her hand up and said I only think with my dick So I told her to blow my mind, then."

"Friendly advice: Don't compare your girlfriend to an avocado. Even if she IS the good kind of fat."