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Joke of the Day

"Dear phone. If you wouldn't remind me every ten seconds that my battery was low, I'd be able to finish my status upda"

"Q: Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backward? A: They like the part where the hooker gives the money back."

"What is the difference between paint and a midgets' underpants? When you sniff paint, you get high"

"Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock KNOCK KNOCK. Who is there? The pilot."

"My girlfriend said ""Give me 10 inches and make it hurt!"" So I stabbed her with a ruler."

"Wi Fi doesn't work so well in the office. HR will need to talk to this lazy Vietnamese."

"Did you hear about that guy who had his penis enlarged? He's much cockier now."

"I think i am allergic to leather. Every time i wake up with my shoes on, i have a huge headache."

"Buddha: all life is suffering Me: alright dude, chill out. they said your food would be out in ten minutes"

"Curiosity killed the cat... NASA sincerely apologizes..."