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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about that mad cow disease? A cow to another: ""Did you hear about that mad cow disease? Makes cows go completely insane!"" The other cow: ""Good thing I'm a helicopter!"""

Next Joke
 
"Good neighbors never bother you. Great neighbors don't call the cops when you pass out naked on their lawn."
"Son asked me what an 'erection' was & somehow I referenced Pinocchio. So I either cured him of lying or launched his career as a politician."
"I always looked up to my Grandad... I especially remember his last words. Stop shaking the ladder you little cunt!!!"
"2 Scottish cows in a field: which one is on holiday? The one with the wee calf."
"Hot singles in your area want you to come over and load their dishwasher correctly."
"Why do Japanese people squint? Nuclear explosions are bright"
"What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion? I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes"
"[courtroom] Me: ""I OBJECT YOUR HONOR"" Judge: on what grounds? ""LEGAL MUMBO JUMBO"" Prosecutor: he's good Judge: *slams gavel* case dismissed."
"Girls don't poop. They go to the bathroom to talk shit."