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Joke of the Day
"Problems I've got 99 problems and they're all first world."
Next Joke
"Judas: Still on for friday? ""Jesus: friday?"" ""Judas: Yeah, the Last Supper."" ""Jesus: The what?"" ""Judas: Supper. Normal supper with the fellas."""
"If I were Spock, I would spend 24 hours a day saying things like ""get out of my Vulcan face"" and ""are you Vulcan kidding me?"""
"I don't like road head I always have whiskey dick."
"Chick in front of me has 'Charley Horse' tattooed down the back of her leg. Cramp stamp."
"What does a mermaid mathematicion wear? An Algae-bra."
"Why was the gymnast disqualified? He walked into a bar."
"[parent-teacher conference] Teacher: Which kid is yours? Me: I don't have kids. I just heard the teachers here are hot. T: M: How you doin'?"
"Mistakenly punched premium at the gas pump today and now I have to sell one of my kids to the circus."
"""Hola, Senor, do you want me to shift into second gear?"" Manuel transmission"