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Joke of the Day

"I would pay big bucks to Sea World to see a dolphin fly out of a water tank into the stands and start rolling around and eating people."

"I was going to go check out r/TwoX..... but it's just a bunch of pussies there"

"[Dog yoga class] Teacher: Alright, let's go into downward human pose [Dogs hunch over and start pretending to text]"

"What's the difference between a baby and a fridge? The fridge doesn't cry when you put your meat in it"

"Why does the alphabet like to piss on the periodic table? Because it's elemental pee!"

"Pretty rude of my boyfriends' wife to keep posting pics from their trip to Aruba."

"I didn't plan on getting a brain transplant... But then I changed my mind."

"UPS driver jumps out within 2 sec"

"Why do so many Jews enjoy smoking? The ashes reminds them of their parents."

"How is a Bill Cosby better than Ronda Rousey? He's never met a woman he hasn't knocked out."