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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a kinky guy and a pervert? ""The kinky guy uses the feather but the pervert uses the whole chicken"" As told to me by the old guy who sat next to me on the plane"

"Mascara in my hair-check, hairspray in my eye-check, lipstick on my shirt-check...I'm ready to start this wonderful Monday"

"We may not be able to call black people the N-word But we can say things like ""hey dad"" and ""have a nice day officer."""

"Don't introduce a guy to another guy. No guy needs to know any more guys."

"""It doesn't say anywhere that you have to EAT them, you see,"" I explain to the Olive Garden waitress as my breadstick kingdom adds a library"

"My neighborhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs... I've been his customer for 6 years. I had no idea he was a barber!"

"What did JayZ say to the theoretical mathematician? I feel sorry for you son, I got 99 problems but you got imaginary ones"

"Bae keeps on slippin, slippin, slippin Into da futuuurrrree"

"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing, because they're both suck up bitches."

"My new juice cleanse is called Vodka with a side of Tonic"