3336

Joke of the Day

"friend of mine collapsed while he was putting the washing out the other day and had to be rushed to hospital. He almost pegged it."

"The national bird of Syria is.. ..a drone."

"I just picked up the Germanwings iPhone app... When I switched on airplane mode, it locked me out of the phone and then crashed."

"I actually like the smell of moth balls, but it's so hard to hold them still without hurting their little wings."

"""I wish there was a more convenient way to stalk others""- The phrase that started Facebook."

"I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York."

"What does Melania call it when Donald takes Viagra? A rigged erection."

"Has anyone checked whether cows really have 4 stomachs? Because it kinda sounds like a lie a cow made up once to get more food"

"What is 007's favorite subject at school? Chemistry, because he knows a lot about bonds!"

"My wife told me to give her 12"" and make her scream... So I did her 3 times in the poop chute and wiped my junk on the curtain. (can't remember where I stole this from)"