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Joke of the Day
"I haven't slept for ten days... ... Because that would be too long."
Next Joke
"Wife: You only half-listen to me. You're in a boatload of trouble. Me: Yes, let's buy a boat."
"A priest, rapist and a pedophile walks in to a bar... ...he orders a drink."
"If you want to touch the sky... Fuck a duck and you will fly! (I don' know who is credited with first saying this time-honored literary pearl.)"
"Sex is like math Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray you don't multiply!"
"What did Hillary Clinton say when Bill wanted a new Saxophone ""Not until you get rid of that HarMonica."""
"My iPhone keeps auto-correcting ""My iPhone keeps auto-correcting"" to "" You don't have a fucking iPhone, asshole""."
"What's the difference between a Pizza and an onion? No one cries when you cut up Pizza."
"I wonder if internet commenters ever get tired of solving the world's greatest problems."
"I like jokes about Ethiopians They never get old."