30220

Joke of the Day

"I'm voting my fridge for president. Because America needs to chill the fuck out."

"Did you hear about that guy who got killed in a rice field by a hitman with a porcelain doll? Police are saying it's the first known case of a knick-knack-paddy-wack."

"My girlfriend just said she's leaving me because of my obsession with goats. Meh."

"haha sucks for women that they have to sit down to poop"

"Did you know the first baseball game was held in the Garden of Eden? Eve stole first, Adam stole second, and Abel struck out."

"What do you call a tired cow? Milked out!"

"Dubai don't like 'The Flintstones'... Abu Dhabi do."

"Two cats cross a river... first cats name is un deux trois. The second cats name is one two three. Which cat made it across? The second cat because un deux trois cat sank."

"Since I started dating my girlfriend a year ago I became a millionaire! 6 months ago I was a billionaire :("

"How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb? Well I'm not just going to tell you. You need to figure it out yourself."