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Joke of the Day

"It is okay to make jokes about Donald Trump, For now..."

"What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!"

"My girlfriend is in the hospital after she ate a giant bacon cheese burger. It was mine."

"I hate when a texting convo goes like this You: heyy. Them: hey! You: watzup? Them: nothin wbu? You: same. Them: cool. You: yea Them: haha. You: lol. Them: yep."

"Most women have a love hate relationship with their scale, but I'm convinced mine goes out of her way to piss me off."

"I attended a festival this weekend with premium pay porta-johns.. They had a special, 2 for the price of 1."

"An electrician walks into intensive care and yells: Hold your breaths, I am about to start replacing circuit breakers'"

"Just been offered a 42 Plasma TV for 100. Only problem is the volume control is broken, I thought fuck it, at that price you can't turn it down."

"I was desperate, I *needed* a recipe for Indian bread! But I found naan..."

"Yo momma's so stupid when she tried to commit suicide, she killed her twin."