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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend asked me to act like an animal in bed. So I peed on the pillow."
Next Joke
"I dreamt I was in a very magical world where people didn't get butthurt over every little f*cking joke. Weird huh?!?!"
"Eating at this new Hitler-themed breakfast place, Luftwaffles."
"why do JEWS have big noses ? air is free"
"Nothing like working out to make you feel like you deserve that burger and fries."
"Excuse me, waiter. Is my order almost ready to Instagram?"
"Why did the computer squeak? Someone stepped on the mouse."
"I don't see why people say, ""God, send me a sign"". Why not ask the Head of Amazon's shipping department?"
"Q: What did the leprotic john say to the hooker? A: Keep the tip."
"We need to be more concerned about dinosaur ghosts"