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Joke of the Day

"Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice? My boner, during my girlfriends period."

"If I got a dollar every time a girl said I wasn't her type, I'd be her type."

"Where do snowmen keep their money ? In a snowbank !"

"[in bed] Me: got a costume from the Princess Leia slave scene Him: omg yes Me: *disappears to change* *comes back dressed as Jabba the Hutt*"

"That awkward moment when you're trying not to look when someone is staring at you."

"Why did the gay man sue the mental hospital? They held him in a straightjacket."

"Did you hear about the guy who had ADD and schizophrenia? He heard voices, but could never pay attention long enough to them to do anything crazy."

"What do Jewish women get when they go to the gynecologist? A pap schmear."

"I have a new doctor. He wanted to check my prostate and I told him that I don't do that on the first appointment."

"Why can't you talk to spiders who get shut in pianos? They'll B flat"