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Joke of the Day

"Nobody in 1972 would have guessed that in 2014, Bill Cosby and Charles Manson would both be in the news, but Manson more favorably."

"Oh ya, let's sit down and talk about it! *That's how I end and win any argument with hubby."

"I named my first dog ""What"". Only now did I just realize why the guy on tech support was getting so angry when he repeatedly asked ""What is the name of your first pet?"" and I kept answering ""Yes."""

"MY DATE WHO IS A SQUID: What movie should we see? ME, SECRETLY TRYING TO HARVEST HER INK: Something super scary *I empty my popcorn bucket*"

"Kids are like farts You only accept them if they're yours"

"What do people with an extra chromosome wash their clothes with? Downy."

"Cuddled up to my girlfriend last night, she said, ""Aw you finally chose me over Facebook!"" I just didn't have the heart to tell her my battery just died."

"Why couldn't I run the Compressed File? I was missing the important Bits."

"Saw an ISIS poster yesterday It read ""Sign up for ISIS today! Receive free jacket and blowjob!"""

"Why do you become a smurf every time you are sad? Because you're feeling blue."