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Joke of the Day

"How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face."

"What do you call a Persian lesbian? A flying carpet muncher. I'm so sorry."

"Women never find it devilishly charming when I follow them into the lady's room. Thanks a lot, ""Top Gun""."

"What did one frog say.to the other? Time's sure fun when you're having flies!"

"Three nuns are sitting on a park bench when a flasher comes by and opens his trench coat. The first two nuns each had a stroke. The third nun couldn't reach."

"Talk to your kids about drugs. Learn which drugs are cool rn. You don't wanna be a nerd parent"

"I put Red Bull in the hummingbird feeder. I'm pretty sure I just saw one go back in time..."

"Drake Lyrics I was running and I stubbed my fuckin toe, you know how that shit go, I went down to the floor"

"I'm going to keep buying cats until one of them does something hilarious and makes me a YouTube millionaire."

"A bad picture of you, and your automatic response is... ""Don't put that on Facebook!"""