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Joke of the Day
"What do you call Nazis from San Francisco? Bay Aryans"
Next Joke
"I put suicide notes next to roadkill so their animal families have some closure"
"My mother was over the age of fifty when she gave birth to me You could say I was born with a silver poon in my mouth."
"If you're a vegan w a gluten allergy who doesn't own a TV do you put it on a business card or just wait to force it into every conversation?"
"100 million years ago there were no creationists."
"Why is a banana peel on the sidewalk like music? Because if you don't C sharp you'll B flat."
"ME: where's your brother? OLDEST CHILD: where's another roll of duct tape? ME: *sprints to the basement*"
"What's Mary short for? She's got no legs."
"I just stopped at a yellow light to give myself a few extra seconds to craft this tweet."
"there is nothing wrong with being nice, but there is something wrong with being nice to people."