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Joke of the Day

"YOU: I murdered someone. YOUR DOG: I'm totally cool with that. I love you. ****************** YOU: I murdered someone. YOUR CAT: Me too."

"Where do Jewish kids go in the summer to learn to study better? Concentration camp"

"how do I tell my boss I don't want to do work anymore but still want money"

"Guns don't kill people. Dying kills people."

"Knock knock Knock, knock. Who's there? Adore. Adore who? Adore is between us. Open up!"

"What are the first words Jared Fogle's girlfriend said to him? ""Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies, sir?"""

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? ""How do you breathe through something that small?!"""

"What's the best part of having sex with 25 year olds? There are twenty of them."

"What's the difference between premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction? One's pretty quick, the other's a quitty prick."

"Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks; ""Why the long face?"""