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Joke of the Day

"Airport receptionist: anything to declare? Me: how bout these guns? *flexes* Her: OH GOD HE'S GOT GUNS! Me: wait.. I was.. Her: HELP!! AGH!"

"What fruits do vampires eat? Blood oranges."

"Last night I overheard a punchline, but didn't hear the preceding joke. The punchline is inside, you tell me the joke. Bruce Jenner's cat"

"Well, the definition of humour is not much humorous! The Incongruity Theory claims that humour is created out of a violation of an expectation."

"Did you hear about the pigs who took up motorcycling? They wanted to catch bugs with their teeth."

"Can clocks keep secrets? Time will tell."

"Women's sports"

"My favorite poem Roses are red Violets are blue I hope I don't Impregnate you"

"What kind of a fish does your Parrot sit on? A Perch!"

"My boss asked me to put two pieces of wood together. I totally nailed it."