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Joke of the Day

"How many Jews can you fit in a vw? 55. 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 50 in the ashtray"

"Why can't John complete a workout? He tried, but it didn't work out."

"I was stranded in the swamp for days with no food I had no choice but to hunt down large white birds and eat them. Through the whole ordeal, I found myself filled with egret."

"AROMATHERAPY CONNUDRUM: Spilling a large bucket of Lavender oil all over your carpet: Very stressful, or very relaxing?"

"elephant: i'm thirsty, how do i drink mother nature: inhale water & squirt it from ur nose directly into ur mouth elephant: what the hell"

"""If Bernie doesn't get the nom, I'm voting Trump."" ""Also, if McDonald's is out of chicken nuggets, I'm going to eat 20 scorpions."""

"Google needs a ""you really don't want to know"" search answer."

"Shawty: Where's the naan brad Lad: there's naan left..."

"I was wondering why I had pentagrams on my palms. Then I remembered: I've been using hand satanizer."

"I learned something new about Hordor (GOT SPOILERS) He's Canadian."